Day 5 +5 of 28 – we’ve still got it good
Dear friends and fellow captives,
Well lovelies, tough end to the weekend with the awful news that the first person has lost her life to COVID-19. My thoughts are with her family, friends and wider community. Now more than ever we need to focus on what we are doing and what we are seeking to achieve. But to get through this we also have to be positive and concentrate on what we still have, not the freedoms we have given up. We are lucky in so many ways. We still have so much. And so many more people on this country and overseas have it so much worse than us.
So Mantra for today “we’ve still got it good” (deliberately poor English).
18% of lockdown done. (Yes I did have to use the calculator to work that out.) To get through the remaining 82%, I choose to focus on the positives and deal with one day at a time.
Things to be grateful for
I asked teenager number two to list those things he was grateful for late on Saturday night when we had more tears and angry recrimination over the ruin of his school year which was delivered in a way that meant it was entirely my fault.[1] After we got through:
-You don’t understand;
-Everything I was looking forward to has gone;
-I have nothing now to achieve this year.
and other yelled/sobbed complaints, I was able to focus him on what he does have, not what he has lost.
So, we now have a poorly handwritten list of things to be grateful for.
Unsurprising, and taking pride of place as everyone’s favourite in the house, is of course the dog. Although his status as the most beloved wavered after he rolled in something truly awful at the park and it took 2 of us 30 minutes and several rounds of shampoo to get the stench off him. Once back to the pleasant smelling pooch we know and love, he righty took back his throne as firm bubble favourite.
Even though he is favourite I realised yesterday that in fact we had all forgotten his 10th birthday last week. Being the favourite is clearly not all that!
Mental note for all, despite baking biscuits on Saturday and cooking a desert Sunday night I only made no 2 on list alongside the rest of the family. No point trying that hard. Will now do less.
Of course we are also grateful we have a warm and comfortable house. We are comfortable and thankfully we can find a space to get away from each other when we need to. #lucky
Scoring very highly on the gratitude list is being able to talk to family and friends over skype/zoom/facetime. They cheer you up and make you feel like you have had social contact outside of your bubble. I am sooo grateful for that with the kids. They shine after getting off their calls with their mates.
Of course there is food and our health – not in that order. Thank goodness for both.
Lastly, as husband put it, we are so lucky that “we are locked in our bubble with people we actually get on with – for now.” It wasn’t really helpful to add the qualifier but since he used it I did spend a good portion of yesterday early evening making him rethink whether he liked me as I became irrationally grumpy and sulky. I had had enough and wanted to pretend for a bit my fellow bubblers did not exist but it is a bit hard in a galley kitchen when you are trying to cook dinner. They are all on top of you. Grrr.
So having gotten over my sulk, absorbed my gratitude, and let it sink into teenager no 2, we are okay and that is good enough. We are lucky we have everything we need.
The much feared weekend
As you know I was dreading the weekend. Having conquered my current Everest, I feel I have now learnt how to get though a weekend with teenagers and can apply the same formula to upcoming weekends. Simple recipe involving:
-letting them sleep in like hibernating grizzly bears. They can go for hours thereby reducing the time they are up, grunting and feeding;
-after first feeding session, get them out of the house for a local bike ride or long walk;
-even when on said bike ride or walk if one child (the impossibly lippy and loud one-again teenager no 2) screams that he has such chest pain he is about to die and we don’t care, keep going to ensure you have worn them out. If you need to, pretend they are not your children.
-then feed them and ignore device time – half the day has gone anyway so that has already limited device time;
Then feed again, put on movie and day done;
Repeat on day 2.
My husband’s theory is also that for us to mark out the weekend as a weekend and distinct from the week days, I am not allowed a gin until we reach Friday. That way I will know when I get my sought after gin on Saturday and Sunday I will know the difference and appreciate the weekends. Such sad, but insightful, logic.
So we knocked the bugger (weekend) off. We made it to another week.
Now back to work
Somehow we now switch it up and get back to work with new enthusiasm and commitment. Sigh. Don’t have any but maybe another coffee will help…
Kia kaha, my lovelies, and adieu. Stay safe and remember, being okay is good enough.
Silky Otter
[1] Its not really fair to call him a teenager yet. He turns 13 during lockdown hence the tears. Yes, we did manage to organise a birthday present right before lockdown. Phew!